1) True love
Our society has a few things that it doesn't like for people to go after directly. It's futile, we say. Or perhaps, by going after it you forfeit it. There are lots of stories about great things being given to the one that actually didn't want the great thing, much to the grumbling of everyone that actually did want it. Let go, and it will come to you.
I wonder, is this a case where society really has learned what is best for us... sort of a natural selection of philosophies where over time the best philosophy survives even if nobody knows exactly why? Or is it something else? I don't know why, but today something about it feels sinister to me.
I guess that means I should go to the barbecue now.