A couple times this week I came home from work completely exhausted and ended up falling asleep around 10pm on the couch, silly sci-fi novel (
Here's a quick list of projects, as much to jog my own memory as to offer for your own: moblogging site (25% done), double blind email system (25% done), hellomachine (25% done... still!), political site (15% done), man versus himself self-promotion and self-parody (40% done), new novel (still in planning), learning lojban (still reading "what is lojban" book). Soon I'll be taking up learning how to develop applications in Cocoa on OS X (my new 15" powerbook is on its way as we speak). In the meantime I've lapsed in my gym-membership usage, have upped my evening activities with friends, and have brand new cavities (despite my fervent sonicare usage). I need to reign myself in, get my house in order, etc... but what to dust off and what to throw out?
A while ago I gave myself a November 4th deadline for figuring out my next
Anyone that's been reading this blog for a while recognizes this pattern. I could go dig up the identical entries (with different project names and timestamps) from the last 4 years (have I really been writing this same old nonsense that long?). Each time there's this hope that I might find the way out of repeating history the next time, since I know this history so well, but I think the two steps forward, two steps back rhythm is a more permanent pattern than that (though I don't think it's healthy to admit that, it's a little like giving up). Each time I walk back and forth between doing nothing and doing everything I just reinforce the groove in the carpet. Maybe I'm not a changing thing, but a static thing that shakes a bit. Getting lost in boring thoughts, what a drag.
I want to talk about loyalty sometime soon. Is loyalty a good thing? Because I have none of it: not to my friends, family, company, country, religion, species, or universe. I think loyalty is just group-imposed lock-in designed to increase perceived exit costs... but loyalty has no value to the individual beyond protecting them from their own bad decisions. If you trust your decision making, loyalty shouldn't be a part of the equation, should it? I know, random. I bet the group will come kill me now.
One more thing. Nah, nevermind.